Yesterday I posted a comment in response to someone’s post on Facebook. A few other people posted comments after me. This morning I check Facebook and I see that everyone else’s post had been liked by the original poster, but not mine. And this is someone who is important in my life.
I was mortified. Was I an embarrassment to them? Did I come across as an immature idiot? Was it because I was having a little fun and not being ‘professional’ and ‘circumspect’ on their wall? Or were they just annoyed with me for whatever reason?
It got me thinking and so I did a little research. It appears that getting ignored on social media has been the subject of several studies and the results are interesting.
If you get ignored on social media, it can be ‘psychological hell’ according to this one study done: “Being ignored on Facebook is pyschological hell.” Those that did not get any responses to their posts admitted to feeling ‘invisible’ and ‘ostracized’ especially if it is close friends and family that have not responded.
We all need validation as people, despite all the ‘experts’ out there who say that the only validation we require is from ourselves. That may be true, but we are social animals and interaction and connection with other people is vital for our well-being.
That is why solitary confinement is used extensively as a punishment in prisons, often with disastrous results: “… inmates became stir-crazy, attempting and succeeding in killing themselves”.
Our responses to being ignored on social media range from anger and petulance to indifference, depending on the nature of the relationship you have with different people. Everyone has had the reaction of “Ignore me will you? I am so going to block your ass.” at some point in their lives. Admit it. I know you have.
And my reaction to being ignored? I have decided to go with the really mature and professional response as seen in the attached image.
Di
Diana Heuser specialises in e-Business and Publishing Resources for Authors. Connect with Diana Heuser on her business website, via Twitter @DianaHeuser or on Google+. She has recently started a new group called Secrets To Publishing A Book that you will find interesting.
This is so interesting… we DO react or over-react when our posts and comments are ignored.
It also shows how effective the old fashioned punishment of “being sent to Coventry” was…. as being ignored is the ultimate pain.
Notice that even your pets will respond frantically to being pointedly ignored in their attempts to get attention or affection.
No one likes being ignored!!!
So true Helene. The challenge is that we will always be ingored by someone. At some point we have to let go of our expectations of others, and realise that we are enough. 😉